Friday, May 8, 2009

What's Next?!

Boston scores 12 runs in an inning before an out?
Cliff Lee carries a shutout into the 8th inning and loses?
Masa Kobayashi is still in the United States?
Things are so bad with the Cleveland Indians,
the town is preparing for the worst with the Cavaliers!
There was;
"The Drive"
"The Fumble"
"The Shot"
"The Mesa"
"The Trade"
"The Other Trade"
"Oh, That Trade, Too!"
Weary Clevelanders are wondering what will keep LBJ and the Cavs from winning the first major sports championship in Cleveland since 1964!...
"The Injury?"
"The Swine Flu?"
"The Steroid?"
"The Asteroid?"
"An Early Judgement Day?"
Well, that is just not going to happen because the Cavaliers will win the championship this year and bring it to this town for the first time since 1964!
But that certainly is not going to help our hapless Indians, is it?
Here's a thought...
Because Manny is a dirty-rat cheater, Major League Baseball awards the Cleveland Indians the 2007 ALCS and allows a computer to play the World Series between the Colorado Rockies and the Cleveland Indians and of course, the Indians win! However, their championship will be tainted with an asterisk, as will the year 2007 and the word "Championship" from now on.
Hey, that's not a bad idea!
Why not let a computer, let's call him 'Roid, play all of the Cleveland Indians' remaining games in the 2009 season? Virtual Eric Wedge can sit in the dugout and play with his USB as the Indians fall for a record number of losses. Other teams can have the night off as their "Me's" take the field. We can virtually travel to New York and those wonderful sports in the rotten apple can be represented by "fans" that interfere with batted balls in the will be so realistic! And then, just for shits and giggles, let's have the home plate umpire make a really piss-poor third strike call on all of the virtual Indians!
But seriously, how much more is it going to take to get someone to do something to fix this team? Perhaps MLB commissioner "Able Bud" will put a moratorium on trades, kinda like what happened to the Cavaliers in the'70s! Bud would have to approve any trade, draft, promotion, demotion, lineup, pitching change, substitution, etc. to ensure the franchise doesn't go belly-up.
So, who is to blame? The players? Grady Sizemore is batting just over .200. Rafael Perez can't throw a strike. Jensen Lewis, Aaron Laffey, Fausto, Ben Francisco, all of them just up and went bad?
Get a General Manager, a Team Manager, and a Pitching Coach and put them with these same guys, many of whom almost went to the world series in 2007, and the team will drastically improve and immediately compete.
While were at it, a change in ownership wouldn't hurt a damned bit either!

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