Carnac The Magnificent, Please Enlighten Tribe Fans Everywhere!

It is time for Mark Shapiro to don the “Carnac” turban and give some psychic guidance to his “co-host” Eric Wedge and the rest of the Tribe faithful. The plethora of envelopes, all of which are hermetically sealed, have been kept in a mustard jar on the Home Run porch since midnight.
Enter Mark “Carnac” Shapiro to the media room where he invariably trips on his title and crashes head first into a whipped cream pie, strategically placed on the podium. Wedgy brings him the questions that he and the Indians’ loyal fans so desperately await to be answered. Carnac holds each envelope to his head, divulges the answer, then rips open the edge of the envelope, blows it open, pulls the question out and reads it aloud:

A. “Casey Blake!”
Wedgy repeats, “Casey Blake!”
Q. “On the team charter, if the pilot took ill, who would fill-in and land the plane?”

A. “C.C. Sabathia!”
Wedgy repeats, “C.C. Sabathia!”
Q. “If he doesn’t start to get some run support ASAP, who will be impossible to sign to a contract, keeping him in Cleveland where he belongs?”

A. “Casey Blake!”
Wedgy repeats, “Casey Blake!”
Q. “If Rosanne Barr fails to show to sing the National Anthem, who can fill-in?”

A. “Rest your best hitter, Victor Martinez!”
Wedgy repeats, “Rest your best hitter, Victor Martinez!”
Q. ‘Our offense is sputtering and we are about to begin a very important 4 game series with Boston, how should we proceed?”

A. “Leave him out there until the game is completely out of hand!”
Wedgy repeats, “Leave him out there until the game is completely out of hand!”
Q. “What should we do if Cliff Lee gets hammered in the first inning again?”

A. “Leave him out there until the game is completely out of hand!”
Wedgy repeats, “Leave him out there until the game is completely out of hand!”
Q. “What should we do if Jake Westbrook gets hammered in the first inning again?”

A. “Casey Blake!”
Wedgy repeats, “Casey Blake!”
Q. “If the Smoothie machine breaks down in the club house, who can fix it?”

A. “Lee, Westbrook, Cabrera, and Hafner!”
Wedgy repeats, “Lee, Westbrook, Cabrera, and Hafner!”
Q. “What four guys, if they got on track immediately, would pretty much ensure the Indians would win the American League Central and negate the need for a risky, last-minute-to-the-deadline trade?”