Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Chris Perez Hurls For The Tribe!

So you think you have heard about all of the Indians' hurlers? Well wait until you digest this little tidbit (if you can)! It seems Indians' closer Chris Perez was about to sail comfortably through the 9th inning yesterday against the Cubs with a 4-1 lead when the ride got a little bumpy. A hit batter, a walk, and a double later with one out and Perez became more than a little upset! After screaming through his mitt at catcher Carlos Santana, Perez apparently called time out, laid down briefly on the grass behind the pitcher's mound, and then sat up and barfed on the field! Perez related the incident to when he played ball in the hot sun as a youth and having similar experiences. After eating lunch a little too early, he became overheated and experienced low blood sugar, thus causing the reaction. Chris, I am glad that you are OK but I gotta tell you, I love your style! Oh don't worry, the Tribe pulled the game out 4-3 but not until after the reliever found his own relief on the field. It kinda takes you back to a couple of scenes in the movie, "Major League." Jake Taylor and Ricky Vaughn are sitting in a bar and a young man asks Wild Thing for his autograph because Vaughn had been elected into the Hall of Shame that day for walking the bases loaded and then giving up a grand slam. Jake looks at Ricky and says words to the effect of, "You don't have to do something well if you do it colorfully." Later in the movie just before the playoff game vs. the dreaded NY Yankees, Willie Mays Hayes stops Jake Taylor to tell him that power hitter Pedro Serrano is looking for extra power and wants to sacrifice a live chicken in the club house. "Hey Jake man, we can't have guys throwing up all over the place!" Oh yes you can, Willie! There were probably a few other guys who got the dry heaves when Perez upchucked yesterday. You know that almost barfing sensation you get when someone else is in peril? This is big! We need to capitalize on this for the season! It is like the bubble gum bubbles that El Presidente (Dennis Martinez) was putting on guys hats in '95 while they were being interviewed. It's as good as the whipped cream pies in the faces of game MVP as they are telling Matt Underwood all about it after the game in '07. Chris Perez has put a new spin on "Hurler" as well as "Pitching in Relief!" Oh, there is money to be made and fortune to find! Can't you just see Alka Seltzer as a new sponsor of the Cleveland Indians? Picture Chris Perez holding up that little blue box of relief and saying, "I don't take the mound without it!" Plop, Plop, Fizz, Fizz, oh what a relief it is! Chris Perez, not only have you become a very good reliever and closer in the American League, but you are doing it very colorfully as well!

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